For 3 reasons:
1) Because we offer a 1-year, 100% money-back guarantee.
That means if you're not happy with your purchase for any reason whatsoever, you can return your item(s) anytime within 1 year (365 days) of the purchase date... and we'll give you a full 100% refund, regardless of what condition your item(s) are in.
They can be brand new, used, or even broken – it don't matter to us.
Plus, we'll even pay for the return shipping.
Look, we know this sounds too good to be true, but here's the truth:
We know shopping online sucks sometimes. Like when you buy something and it doesn't live up to your expectations... or when the store you buy from f*cks up and ruins your order before it even arrives... or when you just straight up regret a purchase for whatever reason.
We know these feels. We buy a lot of stuff online, too.
But, not only that, you've probably never even heard of our store before and are probably skeptical of us.
That's totally understandable. It's always better to be skeptical & on the safe side than to be a sucker who falls for anything they see on the Internet.
But... that's why we're offering this generous money-back guarantee to you – so that we can take all the risk off your shoulders, and put it on OURS instead.
This way, we can prove to you that we're 100% legit and you'll have literally nothing to lose when buying from us.
So, if you decide to buy from us and aren't satisfied with your purchase for any reason whatsoever, then no worries. We'll give you all your cash back. End of story.
2) Because we offer the best deals on all the coolest stuff.
We created this store for people who don't have the free time to look around for cool stuff that they MIGHT want in their life (the keyword here is might). When you think about it, you can't really look for something if you don't even know it exists yet, right?
That's where we come in.
Basically, because we have a buncha free time on OUR hands, we did the looking for you. We found a buncha cool stuff that you might like, and we give you the best deals on all of it.
Now, you may be thinking... why? Why offer these juicy, irresistible, succulent deals?
Well, my dear Watson, it's because we want you to come back after your first purchase to buy more from us... and the only way we can get you to do that is by giving you an amazing deal upfront and PROVING to you that we're legit.
Okay, that makes sense... but HOW do we get these deals? It's simple, we kill the Batman. Whoops, wrong quote.
Anyway... we're able to get these deals because we go straight to the manufacturers and we cut out all the fat (middlemen & overhead), which means less markups for you.
Most retailers actually markup their prices 3 - 4x the wholesale price they get it at (sometimes even more), but not us. Since we don't have to deal with employees, warehousing, logistics, etc., we can get the products to you at the sexiest prices.
3) Because we're awesome.
Let's be real, wouldn't you rather buy from someone who's awesome than from someone who's a straight up lame? Obviously.
But, it's not just that. Because we're awesome, we make sure to treat our customers right. We're not trying brag or anything (okay, maybe we are), but we believe we have the best customer service of all time.
So with that, and our risk-free guarantee, you can bet your ass you're gonna have an amazing shopping experience with us. You'd better believe that.